I don’t write to be famous, I don’t write to be known, I write because I am and I want to be read. How sad to fill a room with paintings no one sees or play music no one hears. Writing is talking without sound, singing without score and dancing without movement and yet, it is all of them. It is a solitary art conjured from thought and expressed by the need to communicate.
HEAD SLAPS, SPEED BUMPS and LIGHTBULBS, one woman's WTF, oops and ah-ha moments of life.
They were published once, and as every writer knows, once is not enough.
Monday, March 1, 2021
My God it’s been a year.
Is anybody out there?
Does anybody care?
Yes, we were locked down. Two weeks, just us and our pain-in-the-ass mini wiener dog who is sweet and quiet only after the sun goes down. (They haven’t found my husband’s body yet.)
Actually we did OK. We pretty much stuck close to home. Had food delivered until stores set rules in place and the state set mandates. Even now we do not go often. On-line shopping saved Christmas.
Early on not visiting two of our grandchildren was heartbreaking. We got as close as hands against the glass and cried all the way home. Our other Little-One is part of our next-door-nest so we got to spend time with her. We played by the rules, watched the news, and rejoiced when change came in November. We’ve gotten our first shots and are waiting impatiently in line while jittering up and down for our second double dip dish of rocky road. I’m hoping the shots are our get-of-jail-free cards?
What a heartbreaking year it has been. When I think of the fear, suffering, and loss that has taken place I am overwhelmed by it all. How can something so minute loom so large while seeking to annihilate our species? Comprehending the immensity of it is like trying to fathom the depth of the universe. It is just too vast.
When I think of all the time I’ve had to write, and how I used those endless hours for something else, I feel profoundly guilty. Sustaining focus became impossible, editing became a nightmare, the dream of a title page became a stopped clock.
Okay, enough of looking backward. Enough of wondering why, or how, or WTF.
So here I am a year later replacing the double A’s, setting the hands, and listening for the heartbeat of the little mantle clock. Its rhythm is the song of my life. The title of the song? Write.
Ever vigilant, and thankful, and grateful, and cautious, stay well my writer friends, stay well.
2Ns
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Sorry about all one paragraph but during the last year they changed the format and I haven't figured it out yet, Onward !
ReplyDelete2Ns, our lockdown life has been much different to yours, but the year still seemed to stretch to five. Last week I finally saw my parents and best friend after a solid twelve months had passed. Like you I feel I should have much more to show on the page but it remains blank. Still, I am sure as 2020 worsened, 2021 will improve. Here's to your song...
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