Just do it.
If it were easy everybody would be
doing it.
You can’t win if you don’t play.
If at first you don’t succeed,
try, try again.
Just keep swimming, swimming,
just keep swimming.
Never give up.
At what point do you say, this
sucks, I’m outta’ here? I’m tired of just doing it, over and over again. My
brain is water logged and my limbs exhausted from treading water.
And then I asked myself, just what
is it that I want? What is it that any writer wants, a byline, a title page?
I think what every writer wants is validation.
I have written so many words, I
have published hundreds of op-eds, columns and essays and yet it’s not enough,
it’s never enough. It’s like money, even when you have it, you want more.
To me, a traditionally published book
is the epitome of a writer’s success. It means that a whole bunch of
professionals, more educated than me, more in-the-know about books than me, more
author-wise, not only like what I wrote, but love it enough to convince other
in-the-know people to put their publisher’s money behind my project.
That’s a big deal. Am I worthy? Hell yes I am.
Okay so I’ll keep on, keeping on,
until my golden ticket gets punched.
And if it flies out the window on the wings
of a breeze, I’ll Dory it.
When is the last time you said enough is enough, I don't want or need more?
Easy question to answer. Mid-August 2014 when I stepped down from most of my volunteer roles. They were getting bigger and bigger and more demanding until I was working 2 jobs - but one was unpaid. I celebrated with a bottle of bubbly with my writing besties, and I kept the cork to remind myself of how good it felt - to make sure I don't go back there!
ReplyDeleteIsn't it amazing that when you give so much of yourself , sometimes, they just want more and more until you are drained dry. At least you hydrated with bubbly.
Delete"When is the last time you said enough is enough, I don't want or need more?"
ReplyDeleteWell shoot, just last night when I ate that gigantic plate of spaghetti. :)
Seriously, about 18 yrs ago, my mom began taking care of an adopted baby. She was only a week old, and the day the mom dropped her off before work she asked my mom, "you got room for two babies?" My mom was like "huh?" The new mom said, "well, I tried for years to get pregnant and now, somehow, I am. I'm due in about five months."
IDK. I've always heard if you can somehow divert your thoughts onto other things, "it" will happen. I've heard so many similar stories to the one above, I have to believe there's some truth to it. I've had my own instances of letting it go (ARGH, there's that stupid song in my head now), and then? Magic.
Absolutely right.
DeleteI think I'll divert my thoughts from trying so hard to "the hell with it". That's how I met my husband. I stopped looking and wha-lah, I met the man I've been married to for 35 years. Actually it's a great story, I should write about it. Actually I think I did once. Actually it was as Wry Wryter. I should resurrect that one , it's a good one.
Spaghetti, mmm, sounds good.
Actually, my own first pregnancy kind a, sort a, happened that way too. I mean I was doing everything, basal temp thingy, standing on my head, (not quite but close) all kinds of crazy stuff - each month, nope.
DeleteFinally, my then husband and I bought a little trailer (more like a camper) up at Lake Gaston. I focused on cleaning that thing out, and making it livable. Next thing I knew? Pregnant. We sold it.
You know it's funny how life plays out. I have come to the conclusion that there's a path we're all on and if God is gracious we don't get all of what we want, or think we need, until we are supposed to.
DeleteI'm trying to let go of the wants and do my best to accept the gifts I have as enough. Lord knows he sure has been generous.